Personality is very important part of life to developed your successful and greatful life, everyone want to developed our personality, here we share 10 important step for developed your personality.
10 step for building positive personality.
Positive personality, how to developed positive personality, 10 best step for building positive personality.
10 Step to Building A positive personality
1. Accept Responsibility
When people accept additional responsibility they are actually giving themselves a promotion.
Responsible behavior is to accept accountability. That represents maturity. Acceptance of responsibility is a reflection of our attitude and the environment we operate in. Most people are quick to take credit for what goes right but very few would readily accept responsibility when things go wrong. A person who doesn't accept responsibility is not absolved from being responsible. Your objective is to cultivate responsible behavior.
Stop the Blame Game
Avoid phrases such as:
* everyone else does it,
*or no one does it, or
* it is all your fault.
People who don't accept responsibility shift the blame to their parents, teachers and genes. God, fate, luck or the stars. Responsible behavior should be inculcated right from childhood. It cannot be taught without a certain degree of obedience.
2. Choose your words carefully.
A person who says what ever he likes usually ends up hearing what he doesn't like. Be tactful. Tact consists of choosing one's words carefully and knowing how far to go. It also means knowing what to say and what to leave unsaid. Talent without tact may not always be desirable. Words reflect attitude. Words can hurt feelings and destroy relationships. More people have been hurt by an improper choice of words than by any natural disaster. Choose what you say rather than say what you choose. That is the difference between wisdom and foolishness.
Excessive talking does not mean communication talk less: say more.
A fool speaks without thinking : A wise man thinks before speaking.
Words spoken out of bitterness can cause irreparable damage. The way parents speak to their children in many instances shapes their children's destiny.
3. Don't Criticize and Complain.
When I talk of criticism , I refer to negative criticism When a person is criticized , he becomes defensive critic is often like a back - seat driver who drives the driver mad . Does that mean we should never criticize , nor can we give positive criticism ?
Positive Criticism
How do you offer constructive criticism ? Criticize with a spirit of helpfulness rather than as a put - down . Offer solutions in your criticism . Criticize the behavior not the person , because when we criticize the person , we hurt their self - esteem . The right to criticize comes with the desire to help . As long as the act of criticizing does not give pleasure to the giver , it is okay . When giving criticism becomes a pleasure , it is time to stop .
Some suggestions for giving criticism that motivates others :
• Be a coach - criticize with a helpful attitude . A coach criticizes to help improve performance of the athlete .
• Understanding and concern will act as a motivator . • The attitude should be corrective rather than punitive .
• Be specific , rather than saying things like " you always " or " you never . " Vague criticism causes resentment
•Get your facts right . Don't jump to conclusions . We all have the right to our opinions but we don't have the right to incorrect facts . Don't rush to criticize .
• Maintain your cool but be firm . . Criticize to persuade , not intimidate . . Don't be sarcastic as it builds resentment .
• If criticism is given appropriately , it will reduce the need for repetition
• Criticize in private not in public . Why ? Because it maintains goodwill whereas public criticism can be humiliating . . Give the other person an opportunity to explain his side . Show them how they would benefit from correcting their mistake .
• Point out the loss from not correcting it . . Rather than telling , ask for suggestions for improvement Question the action , not the intent . If intent is in question , then it is better to terminate the relationship.
• Criticize the performance , not the performer . . Don't express personal resentment .
• Keep criticism in perspective . Don't overdo it . Criticism is like giving medication . The medication should be the right mixture with a perfect dosage . Too much will have adverse effects and too little will be ineffective . Given in a positive way in the right dosage , it can work wonders .
• When someone realizes and admits his mistake and apologizes , let him save face .
• Close on a positive note with appreciation .
4. Smile and be kind.
A smile cost nothing, but it creates much.
It enriches those who receive it without impoverishing those who give it.
It happens in a flash, and the memory of it may last forever.
None are so rich that they cannot be richer for it's benefits.
It creates happiness in the home, fosters goodwill in a business, and is the countersign of friends.
It is rest to the weary, day light to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad, and nature's best antidote for trouble.
Yes it cannot be begged, bought, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is worth nothing to anyone until it is given away.
In the course of the day some of your acquaintances may be too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of yours. Nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give.
Cheerfulness flows from goodness. A smile can be fake or genuine. The key is to have a genuine one. It takes more muscles to frown than to smile. It is easier to smile than frown. It improves face value. Who likes to be around a grouch? No one except may be a bigger grouch! A smile is contagious and is an inexpensive way to improve looks. A smiling face is always welcome.
5. Be a good listener.
One often reads that the art of conversation is dying . But wouldn't you agree that infinitely more valuable and rare is a good listener .
Ask yourself these questions . How does it make you feel when you wanted somebody to listen to you and
•They did more talking than listening ? •They disagreed with the first thing you said .
•They interrupted you at every step . They were impatient and completed every sentence you started .
• They were physically present but mentally absent .
• They heard but didn't listen . You had to repeat the same thing three times because the other wasn't listening .
• They came to conclusions unrelated to facts .
• They asked questions on unrelated topics .
• They were fidgety and distracted .
• They were obviously not listening or paying attention .
All these things show disinterest in the person or the topic and a total lack of courtesy.
Do the following words describe the feeling of not being listened to ?
• Neglected
• Belittled
• Rejected
•Annoyed
•Dejected
• Stupid
• Let down
• Worthless
• Unimportant
• Embarrassed
• Small
• Demotivated
• Ignored
• Disheartened
Let's reverse the scenario . How does it make you feel when you want someone to listen to you and they
• make you comfortable .
•give you their undivided attention .
• ask appropriate and relevant questions .
• show interest in your subject .
Do the following words describe the feeling of being listened to ?
•Important .
• Good
• Pleased
• Happy
• Satisfied
•Appreciated
• Worthwhile
• Encouraged
• Cared for
• Inspired .
6. When you make a mistake, accept it and move on.
"when I am wrong, make me easy to change, and when I am right, make me easy to live with. "
This is good philosophy to live by
Some people live and learn while others live and never learn. Mistakes are to be learned from. The greatest mistakes are to be learned from. The greatest mistake a person can make excuses. Don't dwell on it when you realize your mistake, it is a good idea to accept responsibility for it and apologize. Don't defend it. Why? Acceptance disarms the other person.
7. Discuss But Don't Argus .
Arguments can be avoided and a lot of hesitate prevented by being a little careful . The best way to win an argument is to avoid it . An argument is one thing you will never win . If you win , you lose , If you love you lose . If you win an argument but lose wed job , customer , friend or marriage , what kind of victory is it ? Pretty empty . Arguments result from inflated ego .
Arguing is like fighting a losing battle . Even if one wins , the cost may be more than the victory is worth Emotional battles leave a residual ill will even if you win .
In an argument , both people are trying to have the last word . Argument is nothing more than a battle of egos and results in a yelling contest . A bigger fool than the one who knows it all is the one who argues with him !
What is the difference between an argument and a discussion?
• An argument throws heat, a discussion throws light.
• one stems from ego and a closed mind whereas the other comes from an open mind.
• An argument is an exchange of ignorance whereas a discussion is an exchange of knowledge.
• An argument is an expression of temper whereas a discussion is an expression of logic.
• An argument tries to prove who is right whereas a discussion tries to prove what is right.
8. Turn your promises into commitment.
What is the difference between a promise and a commitment? A promise is a statement of intent. A commitment is a promise that is going to be kept no matter what. In the no matter what, I exclude illegal and immoral things. Commitment comes out of character and leads to conviction.
Can you imagine what kind of a world it would be if people didn't keep their commitments? What would happen to relationships between
• spouses ?
• Employers and employees?
• parents are children?
• students and teachers?
• buyers and sellers?
Uncommitted relationships are shallow and hollow. They are a matter of convenience and are temporary. Nothing lasting has ever been created without commitment.
Commitment says, " I am predictable in the unpredictable future. "
Many people confuse commitment with confinement. That really is not true. Commitment does not take away freedom, it actually gives more freedom because it pro-vides a sense of security.
The most important commitment we ever make is to your values. That is why it is imperative to have good value system. For example, if I committed myself to support a leader who later becomes a drug dealer, do I continue my commitment? Not at all.
Commitment leads to enduring relationships through thick and thin. It shows in a person's personality and relationships.
9. Be understanding and caring.
In relationships we all make mistakes and sometimes we are insensitive to the needs of others, especially those very close to us. All this leads to disappointment and resentment. The answer to handling disappointment is understanding.
Relationships don't come about because people are perfect. They come about because of understanding.
There is more gratification in being a caring person than in just being a nice person. A caring attitude builds goodwill , which is the best kind of insurance that person can have and it doesn't cost a thing.
Some people substitute money for caring and under standing . Being understanding is far more important than money and the best way to be understood is to be understanding . The basis of real communication is to understand .
Practice Generosity
Generosity is a sign of emotional maturity . Being generous is being thoughtful and considerate without being asked . Generous people experience the richness of life that a selfish person cannot even dream of Be considerate ; selfishness brings its own punishment . Be sensitive to other people's feelings .
Be Tactful
Tact is very important in any relationship . Tact is the ability to make a point without alienating the other person .
Kindness
Money will buy a great dog but only kindness will make him wag his tail . It is never too soon for kindness because we don't know how soon is too late . Kindness is a language the deaf can hear and the blind can see . It is better to treat a friend with kindness while he is living than display flowers on his grave when he is dead . An act of kindness makes a person feel good regardless of whether he is doing it or it is done to him . Kind words never hurt the tongue .
10 . Develop a Sense of Humor
Some people are humor - impaired . Have a sense of humor and you will possess the ability to laugh at yourself . A sense of humor makes a person likable and attractive.
Learn to laugh at yourself because it is the safest humor . Laughing at yourself gives you the energy to bounce back . Laughter is a natural tranquilizer for people all over the world . Humor may not change the message , but it certainly can help to take the sting out of the bite .
THE HEALING POWER OF HUMOR .
Dr. Norman Cousins , author of Anatomy of an Iiness , is a prime example of how a person can cure himself of a terminal illness . He had a 1 - in - 500 chance of recovery , but Cousin wanted to prove that if there was anything like mind over matter , he'd make it a reality . He figured if negative emotions caused negative chemicals in our body , then the reverse must be true too . Positive emotions , like happiness and laughter , would bring positive chemicals into our system . He moved from the hospital to a hotel and rented humorous movies and literally cured himself by laughing . Of course , medical help is important , but the will to live for the patient is equally , if not more , important . A funny bone could be a lifesaver. Besides, it makes life's adversities easier to handle.